Miami Vice: gun porn

August 10, 2006  |  Review
closeThis post was pub­lished over 700 days ago and there­fore may not rep­res­ent cur­rent Out­side Con­text think­ing or opin­ion. Please, do not let that detract from your enjoy­ment of it!

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Now, I am a fan of Michael Mann’s work. Heat and Col­lat­eral are fant­astic films is The Last of the Mohi­cans. To be extra sure, I went to the cinema with other con­firmed fans and critics:

James (me): Film buff and philo­sopher. Huge Mann fan

Mr Bro: My younger brother, loves films. Big Mann fan.

Cesca: My wife, loves Jamie foxx. Mann fan.

Shirin: Mr Bro’s lady, loves films. Mann fan

Trip: Loves films, doesn’t fol­low them much. Gun fan.

You would think that with this audi­ence that Mann could not fail to eli­cit a pos­it­ive reac­tion. Well, even we didn’t like it. It has a great shoot out, cool gear, hot chicks, hot stars and beau­ti­ful style of direction.

But, well, no pace. Little in the way of proper story. There is no “jour­ney” in the film and a slightly off per­form­ance by Far­rell (who is no Don John­son.) Also, a shock was that there was almost no music at all. I was expect­ing tons of music. Cool 80’s revive catchy stuff, like you find when you play the game GTA Vice City. It had none of that.

Other silly things was the loc­a­tion of the Über Badies lair; Iguassu falls in Brazil. One of the world’s major tour­ist attrac­tions! No crim­inal could live there without hav­ing hun­dreds of tour­ists all around him; lol.

When it comes to gun porn, how­ever, this film had everything.

I coun­ted two LR300’s (ser­i­ously cool), upgraded M90, Rem­ing­tons, 50 cal snipers, G36’s, G3 long and a very unique view­ing of the fant­astic Pat­riot M4 as well as buck­ets of M4’s with all the extras.

In fact, no expense had been spared in the weapon stakes. Even when a trailer park kid pulled a knife it was a top of the range Spy­derco Police model. Slightly out of char­ac­ter for someone liv­ing in a trailer park!

The final shootout was one of the best and most real­istic I had ever seen; loads of people fir­ing at each other and not hit­ting shit. People were using hold and flank moves and the shot­gun guys went for the rush. Just like in airsoft!

It wasn’t enough. I will watch the film again on DVD, but as stands the final score from us was 6/10.

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  1. This entry is cur­rently being rewrit­ten after I saw the film again on DVD. The DVD release fixes the major issue with the movie (the sound) and I was actu­ally able to get into it.

    More soon

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